HAPPY BIRTHDAY WARREN!!!
Haha. his classmates totally made him embarassed today. they bought him a pokemon bag and made him carry it around and tied a barbie doll balloon on the bag somemore. and he got a big pikachu soft toy too.
went to school early in the morning today. a lot of ppl didn't know they didn't had to report for morning assembly so they came early too haha. played for national anthem and school song:) and i did a math paper :D then got back GP compre. essay tmr then get back.
After school went to jurong point with dina:) walk around, talk, shop, eat. basically, slack. it was fun:) and i first time took 172 home. it passes by a lot of military related places i think. like some air base, keat hong camp, home academy etc.
Prelims is over!
I successfully slacked for one day :) went out with class. watch some movie that wasn't worth watching-.- the fact that we're watching it is quite ironic though lol. then went to ion. first time there haha. but didn't really explore it well. i'll go back there someday. most prob after A levels.
dinner was productive haha. funny word to use i know. but ya. managed to finish discussing whatever is needed:)
i feel 'fortunate' to be able to sleep late and not worry abt what paper there is tmr :) And I am going to do what I haven't done for a long time. Tmr morning go class bench and sleep XD
But after today, it's time to get back to reality...
it was really short-lived.
i couldn't sleep last night! I dunno why. was on my bed from like 12.10am to 1 plus am but cannot fall asleep. maybe i was thinking too much. cuz like don't think about anything also cannot sleep so start thinking (then all the more cannot sleep -.-) finally fell asleep though :) dunno why nowadays don't sleep as well as last time. maybe not as tired? but like now take quite long to sleep and sleep halfway will wake up. nv used to do that. last time is lie on my bed less than 5 mins fall asleep already and nv wake up until alarm clock ring one -.-
the horrible mosquito bite on my arm is becoming more unlike a mosquito bite -.- so red. and looks weird:/
STORM songlist today was super nice:) really:) i realised do projection cannot close eyes. cuz like later press wrong thing then everybody will realise except me. and i may not remember where to press also cuz i memorised most of the lyrics (for today's songs) and i cannot jump and press the correct key at the same time lol.
In desperate need of mercy
At the end of my own strength
I fall upon the kindness of Your grace
Lord I know that You are good
You came to rescue me
So please hear my humble fear
Save me Lord save me
I have nowhere else to go
Lord I trust in You alone
To save me my Saviour
I call on Your Name
Jesus save me
Lord I believe You died to set me free
Lord I believe Your blood has ransomed me
Did 2 bio mcq papers today. and planned my study schedule for A levels :/ the calendar is very colourful :) And i like my new 'notebook' :D The cover is pretty:)
Went out for dinner tonight. With xiao gu, weiling, yanjun and the 3 uncles. It was a nice 'get away' if u can call it that. Like don't have to think abt school, exams, and all the other responsibilities. Just concentrate on eating haha :) And I'm happy just eating, walking around, taking food, talking to ppl, serving ppl and stuff. Like just the simple things in life. I'm glad I decided to go:) and somehow I realised that when I talk to my friends, I'm not so 'free' also. Not necessarily a bad thing though. Maybe it's like cuz I don't see my uncles and cousins often, I don't know them very well, they don't know everything about me either, so there's no stress like 'how's ur exams?' or 'so this thing how ah' and i need to make a decision. nothing was mentioned about exams at all :D
there's church tmr:) I'll bring my song lyrics in 'soft copy'. in other words, in my brain haha. :)
I should really do things when I first say I want to do them and not drag. Now I really forget the reason for it already. And I don't feel like doing it anymore.
The greatest love that anyone could ever know
It overcame the cross and grave to find my soul
Til' I see You face to face
And grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You
With all I am I live to see Your kingdom come
And in my heart I pray You let Your will be done
Til' I see You face to face
And grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You
I will live to love You
I will live to bring You praise
I will live
A child in awe of You
You are the voice that called the universe to be
You are the whisper in my heart that speaks to me
Til' I see You face to face
And grace amazing takes me home
I'll trust in You
You alone are God of all
You alone are worthy Lord
And with all I am
My soul will bless Your Name
Left bio and chem paper 1:) can take a short one day break after that i guess. today's break also a short one. I need paper 1 to pull me up :/ My prelim results are going to be horrible.
I think math paper 2 was better than paper 1 though. one good thing. another good thing is that some of my 'intelligent guesses' for chem paper 2 are correct:) bio paper 3 was horrible. really. came out having the jue wang feeling. read the question for so long and don't know what they are trying to say can:/ don't understand how to make intelligent guesses. rah. even paper 2 was understandable.
Nvm. talk abt nicer stuff. I saw Yanting on the bus yesterday! Super long nv see her le. haha 67 gang. we should go out some day. like after A levels:) I read storybook and played piano today:) as a form of slacking haha. Haven't touched the piano in like how long.
i can't really remember what else happened. Go school, exam, come home, study. i think. nothing exciting.
It's difficult to be Christ-like. Really. Makes me realise how awesome He is to be able to be what He is. like how in the world does He do it? I fail totally. Esp with some people. I try to be. It's easy when people reciprocate. But when they don't, I don't see why I should be nice when they are not. I know I have to be nice even if people aren't because Jesus was. But I just can't. I guess I just haven't learnt to love with His love.
On the other hand, today wasn't productive. There's bio paper 3 tmr. I know I'll have to finish studying by hook or by crook. I really need to be more disciplined.
We always try to solve our problems by ourselves. We refuse to learn when we're having it easy. So God has to put us in difficult situations, to the extent of despair before we learn that we must rely on Him.
You are greater.
Everytime I listen to the song second chance, God's forgiveness never fails to strike me. He hasn't only given us a second chance. He has give us a third chance, fourth chance, fifth chance to like infinity. How many times have we failed Him, made Him sad, not listened to Him? Yet He never holds it against us. He forgives us again and again. His promises still hold even though we may have broken all the promises that we made to Him. He will never fail us though we always fail Him. How great is our God!
I realised my past few posts have been quite short. so i shall blog a long one. seeing that i managed to finish studying what i wanted to study today :D
Kay. start with sat. It was totally unproductive. I don't know what i was doing either. I only know i mopped the floor, made pancakes for breakfast and wasted time in front of the com -.- Then afternoon went church for the briefing. And played cards with some youths. And went for dinner. Oh saw a lot of HC ppl at btm cuz got MAF. Then had another meeting. And here comes the interesting part!
MAF! Haha it was fun! I was determined to go for the song and mass dance session even though there was meeting. During the meeting I was like quite impatient 'are we done?' 'can I go off already?' Fortunately there was only one thing on the agenda so quite short. So went to school with Yan. Went there and met Liting and Vic-ki. We were just in time to reach there, put down bag, go round taking pictures then the song session started:) Yan, Liting, Vic-ki and I decided to huddle together cuz 2 ppl like very pathetic. Liting was like 'I think the same way too!' Then Vic-ki said 'That means me and your sister very insignificant lah!' Haha. But it was really fun! Huddle and sing the songs. Except that the huangcheng ppl near us keeping doing funny stuff and step on my leg a few times:/ Then when there was the last song we totally went high. Jump like crazy, sing super loud and out of tune and shouting everything haha. And at the end of it, we were all out of breath :D
Then there was dance session! Couldn't really remember all the dances. But follow the dance ic. Yan was learning on the spot. Quite a good job actually! Cuz you had a good partner lah XD haha I'm glad i'm not dancing the girl part for wild wild west exp if the guy dunno the parts. turn so many rounds sure dizzy one XP And after that there were a few short cheers. And it officially ended. Then the council decided to do their dance. It was only then that you'll realise that so many councillors came back! like 4-5 batches of them. haha. Yep, so after that go home lor:)
Sunday! Went to church. I really forgot abt the questions then uncle kok cheng had to remind me by passing me the piece of paper:/ But fortunately they weren't too difficult. I like one of my answers haha. I think Calvin will like it too XD Then, Ivan last minute ask me sing for storm. He said he sent me the songlist but somehow i didn't receive it. dunno why. then Joyce and I were wondering who was on duty cuz we both weren't lol. Haha Ivan must be wondering why I was like doing the projection, running all over during prac and not singing until he told me to sing. So we had worship! :) And camp meeting.
Then went to ama house. We watch the show until don't want to go home haha. After that proceeded to popo's house. Haha so many grandmothers' house right. Iain was there! He was quite cute yesterday. As in like nv really cry when we play with him. I carry him until my hand super tired. He's getting heavy and I was swinging him around. After a while tired le. Today muscle ache -.- lucky not right hand. And after I got home I forgot to do everything I was supposed to do like type minutes and sms someone:/ I was like 'nothing to do right. ok, go sleep'
Today! Studied stats. finished probability, sampling and hypothesis testing and regression and correlation. So much right? :D Yay! Haha. Tmr must study bio and CLL. I will be productive too:)
Ok, it wasn't your fault. I was really asking why did it happen and I fell asleep-.- Oh wait. I keep forgetting that I got my ans already. Or at least I think I did. Hopefully it doesn't happen again. It wasn't very nice. I was sad:( But I'm not already! :D I still cannot figure out why it's so important though hmmm...
wow quite long:) Ok, i better go type minutes.
Why do we have it if we don't follow it? I rather it doesn't come out at all lah. I was really looking forward to it for the whole week. And that one sms dashed my hopes:( Irritating. I shall not refer to it anymore. It's better to just not expect it and be happy if it comes just like last time. anyway, it's not a really serious matter. so don't worry. It's just something i like to do and i don't get to do it.
4 days to study for the next paper.
i have no idea why i don't feel like doing anything. obviously i don't want to study. but i don't even feel like sleeping, reading, using the com or anything. rah. sian. no show to watch also. i'm bored.
how come everybody send stuff so late this week. i was really really looking forward to that but now i dunno already.
bio was erm not very difficult i guess. but cannot really finish. at the end of the paper mrs foo asked who finished and one guy raised his hand -.- so like 300 ppl didn't.
rah. sat. maf. meeting. briefing. why all the timing so bu san bu si :( I want to go for maf. but obviously meeting more important. and there's the sat service between the briefing and meeting. if i stay, i think mummy will tell me don't go on sun. then dunno if can go for briefing on sun cuz maybe got storm though no sms yet. and anyway i think got camp meeting though no email yet. nvm, think after tmr.
oh. my specs broke o.O haha it last for very long le. nvm i still have 2 pairs haha.
i hardly tasted my lunch today.
i will have self-control.
study chem!
By right, it's in the middle of prelims and there's bio tmr so i shouldn't be blogging. but by left, here i am XD
math was difficult. there goes my A. *grows wings and flies away.
CLL was well not very difficult but well.... no comments
tmr is bio. there's somehow no sense of urgency cuz like too many things to study already. study how hard tonight also cannot finish then dunno which one more important or to concentrate on so like feel like not studying at all XP go try see how 'well' i do. haha. confirm fail. i remember things relatively quickly and forget them even more quickly. so whatever i study for exam will be gone after the exam and must study again for the next exam.
ok. i shall go study whatever i can. haiz...
It's Sunday today! :D Tired but happy. I am somehow resigned to the fact that I'll never get any work done on Sunday. As in school work like study.
Rev Margaret Seaward came again. She is zai really. She's already 78 years old and she preached for 4 consecutive days at our church. yesterday and today preached twice somemore. yep. And she never runs out of stories to tell haha.
then there was youth service. I really liked the worship songs. I think Ivan chooses the nicest songs out of all the worship leaders. Maybe cuz I'm a youth too so prefer 'youth songs' XD Oh aunty sharon told me that Ivan is going to lead 'you hold me now' for main service in the 4th quarter:) haha she was like 'we're going to sing your favourite song'. But i'm not going to be on duty:/ Actually I think my 'favourite' song is only for the period of time until I hear a 'nicer' song :) There are a lot of songs that I like but favourite keeps changing haha. and oh yes. I shall sing louder in future.
"If you can shout, I'm sure you can sing louder" XD
And there was camp meeting after that. Then went to ama house. Ama cooked curry! :) Then after that went to buy sandals and reached home at like 10pm. yawns.
Oh I was reading my last year's posts yesterday and I realised I blogged very frequently and narratively and quite long somemore.
Oh gosh. it's the last day of the holidays already. which means my math paper is in 4 days time. CLL in 5 days time. Bio in 6 days time and Chem in 7 days time.
Time flies. Like really flies. at the speed of erm a jetplane! fast enough? XD There's 51 days left to A levels... and 80 days to the end of it i think.
I cannot wait for Sunday! Awesome songlist haha :) And there's my recently favourite song :D
ok! time to study.
time to find a new way of doing it.
had math consult and chinese lesson today. totally didn't do work in the afternoon. won't say it's a waste of time though :)
why do ppl like to do funny stuff. it's just a sign of their immaturity -.- like seriously. you know it's not true, i know it's not true, but u still want to do it anyway. lol. grow up:)
talked abt a lot of interesting stuff today.
i'm so sorry for not replying cuz msn was a bit crazy and i didn't receive anything until today. but it was quite funny seeing ur monologue there XP quite classic haha.
Oh man. My holidays don't seem like a holiday. To the extent that I totally forgot that it was holidays-.- I was like telling mummy today 'poly holiday already...' then she said 'you're also having holidays what'. and i went 'oh ya i'm having holidays too'. SEE SEE. it doesn't even feel like a holiday :/
anyway, went to watch yan debate today. it was quite an eye opener (not can openerXD ) I think they did well:) And her friends are funny haha. And i saw Ms Lye. She still remembers me o.O Nanyang got champion :D So we went to celebrate after that. Went Seoul Garden to eat :D
I have math consult tmr and lots of undone math questions :/ screwed for prelims. Oh it's past 12 already. It's not tmr. It's TODAY... like later.
Today is the latest time I woke up in like 3 months. I woke up at 10 heh. Then went for the funtastic circus:) It was funtastic! haha. The decorations and atmosphere was really nice! I should have gone earlier. Then can sing all the Hi-kids songs and do the actions. I miss the songs and actions haha. Only went in time for Jesus is the rock! Missed the acrobats also:/ Then helped to give out cheese toast and walked around and everything. haha so exciting:D
The photo taking area is so funny. The elephant and lion look so gigantic compared to the children haha. Oh and the clowns were cute too! Why are clowns mute?
Oh on the way to church I passed by Jia Wei's house then i remembered that his brother was very young and could join the funtastic circus. I forgot to ask him earlier :/ haha his brother is very cute :D
You so totally proved my point XD
Oh i really hope you two can come. I promised that I'll be nice if both of you can make it. I'm sure you can tell what that means:)
Hmm i was randomly thinking and i think that i changed quite a bit over these few years. i would like to think that it's for the better. there's no but :)
the first thing is that i became more outgoing/ extroverted. I remembered asking Vivian this question when i was in sec 2 'do you think i talk a lot?'. And she told me that I only talk a lot when i'm with ppl that i know well. but to other ppl that i don't know well, i'm rather quiet. that's true. but over the years, maybe due to circumstances, maybe due to needs, or maybe I just changed, I became more outgoing. I learnt to approach ppl and talk to them. I learnt to pluck up my courage to start conversations and build relationships. I would obviously like to stay there and let ppl approach me and be friendly towards me but I realised that that's not very possible in life. And I learnt that more than often, it's not very difficult to make ppl happy.
second thing i improved in was decision making. Maybe cuz I'm often forced to like esp when i was sl or group leader or something. when there's somebody to rely on, i tend to rely on the person and not make desicions. esp ppl like luther who seem so confident in everything-.- so actually i think half the decisions for my section were made by him haha. that was out of point. And also because i'm already J2 this year and next year is uni, I started to think abt what I wanted to do after I graduate. esp when there were so many scholarship talks, career talks, uni talks and stuff. I was sort of forced to think cuz it's not very good to have no aim in mind.
ok, i better go read the games for tmr's meeting. haven't touched it for dunno how long. cannot remember anything-.-
GP is over:) It was... okay... Haha actually GP is quite interesting I think. Like just look at all the funny essay questions they can come up with then think of all the funny responses you can give XD okay. Maybe not funny, but responses. If the responses are too funny, the joke will be over by time the results come out-.-
But well, I somehow don't do well for GP. But I thought of one small way to improve my GP. That's to improve my vocab:) Cuz one GP teacher said that my grammar was rather good but vocab very limited. So, I shall increase my vocab range. Here are some words I learnt yesterday and used some of them today:D
germane(cool word right!XD): relevant
filicitous: suitable; well chosen
draconian: very strict/ severe; harsh
herculean: requiring great strength or determination
infalliable: never making mistakes; never doing anything bad
clemency: willingness not to punish; mercy
punitive: intended as punishment
procrustean: blatant disregard for individual differences
pusillanimous(i think it's spelt like that): cowardly
narcissism: too great a love for one's own abilities or physical appearance
haha ok. enough vocab for today. maybe I shall add vocab on my blog sometimes. So my readers can improve on their vocab too haha:)
Is it ever acceptable to break laws?
59 days to A levels o.O
great. I finished typing and I don't know what I did and the post disappeared. I am not going to type again cuz I need to study GP.
Prelims start TOMORROW o.O
I have no mood to do work. And that's bad. But whatever. Shall do what I sometimes do when I'm bored:)
1. Thank you for everything you've done for me. I really hope to continue next year and do well so that I can make you proud. You've really made a great impact in my life. Teaching me so many things and helping me to appreciate things that I never could. Thank you for your patience and love. It's been 10 years. I'll never forget it:)
2. Haha should I thank you in advance too? Well, actually I think what you've done for me is enough already. So thank you! Although I've recently changed what I call you, but thanks for being such a great person all these while I've known you. May not be very long, but we somehow can get along quite well:) I guess it's cuz I was like one of the only ppl free to help you the other time. Haha, I'm really thankful for that opportunity that allowed me to get to know you better. I think it's in these kind of times that bonds can be built, and at a much faster rate also. Yup. Remember to stay happy kay! :D
3. Thank you for bothering to talk to me. Like you can always dao me. But you didn't though you're so busy and stuff. And thank you for caring and offering to be there the other time. I really appreciate it:) Haha under the fierce exterior, you're a really nice person. I think you're really wise and I've learnt a lot from you though you may not know it. Thank you for your confidence in me and all the advice that you've given me. I hope that we can get to know each other better:)
4. Hello hello! Haha yes. You're awesome. Thank you for all you've taught me too. And introduced me to a lot of nice stuff:) I think you have good taste. You're very nice to talk to haha. Funny how quickly u reply sms. Like faster than if i msn u -.- Oh ya. Thanks for answering all my random questions though your assumptions are like way off XP Hope to know u better too!
5. Thank you for the guidance and help you gave the other time. Haha it must have been not very easy to have to follow us all the time. With all our crazy ideas somemore. Having to think abt this and that and to take care of us. Really thank you. And I think u enjoyed yourself the other time. Though i still feel a bit bad:/ But well, it was fun while it lasted. Haha have fun watching your movies ba. A talk with my friend today made me consider watching movies too XD
6. Funny how we're always doing the same thing at the same place but I hardly ever talk to you. Until like that day. I think you're a nice person so I shall try to talk more to you and get to know you better :D I realised I don't really have any way to contact you except in person o.O haha.
Ok. That's enough for today. Have fun guessing if you want:)
I guess it was really about expectations.
Not a very good day today. A consolation is I did some work. but i spent like 2 hours reading eclipse -.-
You never learn from your mistakes, do you. short term memory that lasts for like one week. this kind of thing hasn't happened for too long that you just forget abt it.
Isaac is right. Family should be my first priority cuz I'm always their first priority:)
Well, the little hope kept me going. For a few more questions at the very least. I will not be bothered abt the end result.
You are greater. Greater than the fight that rages for my life. I have found my rest is in you. I have decided I'm going to fix my eyes on the perfector, the author of my days. Jesus Christ.
I've neglected that for too long. Time to go back so it doesn't lose it's point:)