his love endures forever;

Saturday, November 15, 2014

Maybe you’ll see this someday if u’re stalker-ish enough :p I think you will end up reading this given that I don’t update very often so you might not even have to scroll much haha.

well i told u that day that you can tell quite a lot about a person from what they post on tumblr and u asked me what I saw through your tumblr. It was a bit weird to tell you what I think face to face so yup here it is.

I saw a girl who needs to experience God’s love. A girl who has doubts and insecurities that only God’s love can remove. A girl who needs to know that she is fearfully and wonderfully made. A girl who needs to know how much God loves her, and regardless of what she thinks about and how she sees herself, God knows that she is perfect. A girl who wants to know what is the right thing to do and to do the right thing. A girl who is looking for answers in life. A kind-hearted girl who tends to put others before herself and genuinely wants people around her to be happy, even if it means sacrificing herself in some way. And of course a hard-core grey’s anatomy fan :p

And I want to let you know that you are a muchly appreciated friend <3 font="">

‘I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Your works are wonderful, I know that full well'

trumpets forever - 10:52 PM :)

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Finally on VPN after a really long time and yup a really unusual occasion that I'm blogging.

Just came back from shidu after a short holiday with my friends. I guess it is counted as the first time I'm going on a vacation with friends(coming to China is not really counted). It was not too bad I guess. Not a lot of activities but enough cuz somehow it was tiring already. The rush to catch the train was exciting though. Chiong like crazy. Ended up in a crowded train and finding a group of girls on our seat and trying to act cute to get us to change places with them -.- Finally had BBQ! yay! poor fish that got killed on the spot though :/ Went water rafting and bungee jumping too. 2 activities that I am trying for the first time. Water rafting wasn't all too exciting and bungee was not bad though the 脑冲血 feeling wasn't fun at all. Free fall is still something that I have yet to learn to appreciate I guess despite loving roller coaster rides.

Anyway, (at a lost for words). China has been fine I think. It's prob a time for me to get fitter, study harder, get to know ppl better, exploring Beijing a bit more and learning to live by myself. I somehow feel that it has been long enough. I do miss Singapore and the people back there. Comfort zone. Though, studying has became more interesting I feel, esp the western medicine part. So why did I choose tcm in the first place right lol. Going through a detour to learn a little bit of western medicine in chinese. But I feel that the hospitals here really do integrate Chinese and Western medicine very well. Maybe it's just better than anything I've seen in Singapore. I think that it's difficult to achieve this level of integration because people don't trust TCM that much in Singapore. In China, it's the opposite but because of the advancement of Western medicine technology, they have no choice but to keep up. But they have indeed done well in trying to keep up as well as to retain their roots.

Things I want to do:
- bake more
- lose weight, 3kg at least
- intern in tuina, high blood pressure and alzheimer's
- travel ard China: tianjin, inner mongolia, chengdu, qingdao
- make a scrapbook
- go to happy valley

Sometimes I still struggle between the line of being nice and being realistic. Especially with people around. Don't think I'm a really good judge of character and I always feel that I should be nice. It's really good to know that Sok thinks that I hardly talk bad about people though I feel that I do quite a bit (which I know I shouldn't be doing). How nice should we be and when should we draw the line? How much should we tolerate before people take advantage of your niceness? Too many grey areas and blurry lines. Wisdom.

trumpets forever - 9:49 PM :)

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

I realised that the more I understand, the more depressing things become. Maybe it's really better to be totally innocent and ignorant.

How come ppl can do this kind of things? Aren't we all supposed to be good Christians? This is really my first time seeing people that I know being 'hypocritical'. How can they do things like that and then still look as though nothing is happening. I'm not saying that I don't do wrong things myself. But I can say that I do try my best not to.

People are becoming disappointing, things are becoming depressing.

Good reports from the Cambodia team makes me regret choosing to go to Cebu instead of Cambodia.

Cell, church, mission trip... somehow whenever I think of these things, whatever comes into my mind is now depressing instead of happy thoughts like they used to be.

trumpets forever - 10:33 PM :)

Monday, April 29, 2013

In the past few days, God has been really good and so real to me

On Friday I had my wen bing exam. And I was really scared cuz like it seemed like there were so many things that I couldn't rmb. Especially who said what and who wrote what book... I was like 'i really don't care who said what and who wrote what'. But I prayed really hard before the exam cuz I was scared that I would do badly and it's like a 6 AU module. In the end, God answered my prayers. The paper wasn't too difficult and I managed to actually guess some of the answers correctly. There was one qn that I didn't even know what they were asking for exactly so I just tried writing the ans according to what I interpreted the qn to be. In the end, it wasn't exactly what I thought it was but at least my answer fitted 3/5 of the correct answer. I finished the paper early and came out of the exam hall feeling quite good. after that I realised that I had friends that didn't have time to finish the paper. Really thankful.

And on Saturday, I was just talking to choc abt like the forgiveness thing and I was still saying that Sunday's cell is abt forgiveness so it might prob help me. But God didn't let me wait until cell. During main service, Dr Ashley Crane preached on forgiveness and even gave an altar call. I was the first one to go up and he prayed for me. He said that he sees a closed up flower and told me to let the unhappiness go and open up and be a flower in full bloom. I tried, I told God that I couldn't do it on my own and that I really needed Him to help me. And also thanks to choc who care to comfort me. I didn't really expect an instantaneous change after the altar call and I was still thinking whether I have to do like a specific thing to show or prove that I really let it go. But after the service, I realised that the bitterness was really all gone. I couldn't really believe it at first and I was very cautious abt my behaviour but I realised that God really took it away and I didn't have to be careful and pretend to be polite in case I say something mean unintentionally.

And one more thing, I managed to get my first choice of FYP project so I can go to Cebu! :D

Yup, so really really praise God. He is so awesome (:

trumpets forever - 10:05 PM :)

Thursday, January 17, 2013

今天,老师讲了一个很有趣的道理 - 大道至简

大道至简的意思是说其实大道理是非常简单的. 老师举了一个例子来给我们说明 - 如果我想从南大去到乌节路, 我可以用几种方法. 1. 搭巴士 2. 搭地铁 3. 开车 4. 骑脚踏车 5. 走路. 没有一个方法是错的, 也没有一个方法永远是最好的. 只要那个方法能让我从南大去到乌节路, 那个方法就是可行的. 但是, 我只要选择一种方法, 而不是5种都同一时间用,因为那是愚蠢的.

就如中医开药, 治一种病可能有好几种方法, 但只要选择其中一种就可以了. 若想顾及到每一个方面而开了很多种药材, 到头来可能于事无补. 大道至简的核心在于选择. 想当一名高明的医生就必须懂得舍得, 要针对最棘手的方面开药, 而舍弃那些没有那么棘手的方面. 舍得, 舍得, 要舍才会得. 大舍大得, 不舍不得.

到底我要舍什么而得什么呢?

trumpets forever - 8:57 PM :)

Monday, November 05, 2012

Praise the Lord! He is really awesome! He answers prayers :)

Really really glad to see that our cell is finally becoming united as one! Brenda, Charlotte and I were like super happy and excited haha :D Thank God! :)

I am not sure if you still read 'your' blog but cheer up kay... I read your blog post and felt :( I'll be praying for you and remember that you're never alone. You're really awesome! God loves you and so do I! :) Purposely blogged in your favourite colour :) *hugs*

trumpets forever - 10:32 PM :)

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Today didn't really start off well... lesson was in classroom 4 again and once again i was feeling along sitting at the end of the row... started thinking of stuff again... this has been on my mind for like quite a while. was thinking abt it on the bus yesterday too...

I was quite depressed thinking about it. like how come nothing seems to be working out. I'm not doing fantastically well in church, at least i don't think so. Neither am I doing well in school. And there seems to be only these 2 major things in my life. And I am good at neither. Maybe I should just focus and be good at one instead of trying to do both and not doing well for both.

And comparing the 2, giving up church seems more likely. Cuz I don't seem to have a 'future' in church since I will be going to china next year. Nobody will want me to do stuff that I cannot commit to for a long period of time. but school isn't too happy either. feel left out by my friends sometimes. maybe it's really me overthinking again. but thinking of the fact that i have to go china for 2 years and live with them doesn't exactly make me want to jump for joy.

And I was also begrudging the fact that I got a word during church camp which gave me hope but after that nothing seemed to happen and it seems like my hope was going to vanish and that it was just all me thinking and hoping too much.

But after talking to Isaac, he reminded me of the fact that I can serve God anywhere. Which reminded me of the thought I had about going to China and learning chinese and serving in a chinese church which will give me a whole new experience. He also said that God may be moulding me in different areas. And that what I am doing now is preparing me for what I have to do in the future.

Well, now I am a bit more sure that I really am supposed to go to China. And the thought of going to and serving in a church there gives me some hope :) And I also think that God is trying to take me out of my comfort zone, and not let me remain in where I have always been so that I can grow and mature.

But for now, I think I have to serve with more joy. And put all negative thoughts aside. And for now, as in like this very moment, STUDY! :)

trumpets forever - 9:30 PM :)